The Blue Hour, was the best album of 2022. I could have started this piece ten different ways but it would have been a disservice if I didn’t start with that hill. In every piece I’ve written, I open with my discovery of the music of that artist and their career since my discovery but that would also be a disservice to this masterpiece of an album. In brief, I discovered the Oakland-born rapper Rexx Life Raj after stumbling upon “2Free.”
What drew me to his music was the melodic lyricism. What kept me engaged with his music was his honesty. He was honest about his relationships with his friends, his family, and the music. He frequently spoke about music being a savior or an outlet for him. Like many, I was the same. Also like many, music has a way of giving time stamps to eras in my life. At almost any point in my life, I can call back to a song or album that engraved itself into my soul during that time.
In 2022 I lost the woman who raised me. In times of joy and turmoil, I had always turned to music to help ease or elevate my emotions. My therapy was knowing that someone experienced a similar experience and shared it on a track. During this time I listened to many songs and many albums. Isolated bars connected but nothing stuck. In a lot of ways, I turned to my favorite musicians to help and guide me through a dark time.
The transparency and honesty drive this album. The humble nature of the album grounds it. Accepting the unknown and working through it makes this album transcend music and reach souls.
The album begins with sounds of nature before diving into “Reappear.” In an interview on Sway In The Morning, Rexx Life Raj explained that this song was the final recorded for the album. It makes sense as the song introduces the key elements that would be built upon through the course of the album. Within the first two lines, he mentions writing most of the album in the “same room” his mother passed away in. He speaks of the betrayal he felt from friends that “barely tapped in.” He goes through the journey of his own grief.
Raj explains, “Being transparent ain’t a walk in the park/ But it will help somebody else when they walk through the dark.” This is the intention of telling his own story and hoping that it can guide a listener dealing with their own loss. He is taking off the “mask” he used “to try cover up what [He] was going through.” This introduction tackles Raj’s inner thoughts more than anything else. Through that journey, he also lost his father. It is through his remembrance of his father that he then makes it clear what the purpose of the song is: “Wishing somehow all these verses would make you reappear.”
While the introduction of the album is autobiographical and bar-heavy, the transition to “New Normal” is seamless as the song starts with a prayer by an unknown voice. It is only in this last line that the listener realizes that this voice belongs to the mother of Rexx Life Raj when she says, “Our oldest son Faraji.” Though the guitar plays from the beginning, the prayer takes point until Rexx Life Raj’s voice follows up.
The song’s message is as simple as the title would give way to. In the song, Raj is singing about dealing with finding a “new way to live” after experiencing his loss. He acknowledges the pain of figuring this out but also paves the way for gratitude. He sings, “I can feel your energy around me/ Even when you’re not really around me.” In this, he understands that the physical loss doesn’t take away from what he feels. In the end, he is thankful for “the experience” of his mother.
“Save Yourself” is honest and confident. The song navigates the age-old tale of only having yourself. “Ain’t nobody finna come save you/ You gotta save yourself,” Raj raps in his chorus but this message is not bitter. This song is honest in understanding that to move forward, control needs to be taken. He raps, “When I was down bad/ Looked in the mirror and realized I was all that I had/ Had fam and the gang is the landing pad/ But if I don’t steer the plane, then this still crash.” Taking control is a multifaceted path but a way that he was able to do this was by leaving “[people] in the past” and surrounding himself with people who wanted his vision of success “at least bad as [he] do.” Through self-awareness, this song is a stance on the potential and value Rexx Life Raj holds himself to. This is why every time he pulls up, he glows like “diamonds.”
Through acknowledging grief most search for stability. The album takes a turn in this search and in it, Raj looked towards romantic relationships for balance. Thus, “Beauty In The Madness” was born. In an interview with Wonderland Magazine, Raj stated that it was his producer, P-Lo, who used a Tems track as a reference and that the idea had “been sitting with [him] for a minute.” Raj is joined on the track by Wale and Fireboy DML, artists from different sides of the globe who understand the power of a woman in their lives. Wale raps, “We stuck on the physical, I touch you and kiss you/ Then the subject be switching/ Shawty, false hopes/ We just lost souls out here with no horoscopes.”
As Rexx Life Raj transitions in, he only has one request from his partner, to “help [him] find a way to see the beauty in the madness.” It’s clear from the previous tracks what exactly “the madness” is. He even goes as far as to speak on a future filled with “a couple kids” and that as long as she remains “solid” through his grief, she will remain a part of his life. As Fireboy provides the last verse he comprises a list of everything his partner can do to provide comfort in his chaotic life. The list starts with simple actions like “compromising” and picking up the phone. His final request for her to love him with “passion” cements his verse.
After hoping to find a solution through romance, Rexx Life Raj turns to prayer. As his mother’s voice introduces the song, Raj succumbs to the pressure of his circumstances. If this album is a journey through grief then this song is the anger stage. He berates his family and friends for not coming to his aid in his time of need. Raj lashes out at the education system for teaching everything “but how to heal.” Raj is looking to place blame on anything or anyone for his mother’s health and death. He describes his ordeal as, “[Walking] around bearing the weight of a million pounds/ And they wondering how I juggle it wеll/ Like I wear red nose walking, tightropes, in front of a crowd.” Everything between these three lines and the end of the verse is everything behind the mask.
The imagery of a clown calls back to age-old jokes always ending with the realization that the clown is always the saddest in a room full of laughter. The verse is Raj venting up until he realizes something so instrumental in his growth. When he says, “Somebody had to Superman, I was heroic,” it wasn’t braggadocious, it was him realizing that he did everything he could. He recalls what his mother taught him: “I was devoted, God wouldn’t have put it on me if I couldn’t hold it.”
As the album progresses to the halfway point listeners get to “Balance.” This song is interesting as it moves away from the autobiographical nature of the project up until this point. It’s Raj’s story through the verses to give it a personal perspective but the message isn’t for himself. He speaks of leaning on his truest loved ones by providing the names of those in his circle. Yet, the heart of this song lies within the chorus.
When he says, “We all battling the obstacles in life and I know it go, we’re just tryna live, yeah/ But to me, what separates the good from great is just the way you choose to handle it, yeah/ Balance (Balance)/ Tightrope walking, but you balancing/ Balance,” this mantra isn’t singular to him. This one is for the listener. This is about acknowledging, maneuvering, and ultimately, finding a way to navigate through everything that one may grapple with.
After moving past the climax of the project listeners are treated to what makes rap rap, the flex. specifically, this flex is on everyone who didn’t believe that Raj would get past his trauma. He laughs this notion off when he repeatedly raps, “Joke on you, brother…” Fellow West Coast rapper, Larry June’s verse is littered with the same sentiments of being beyond the hate Yet, he expresses his gratitude to those “that been riding.” June drop gems when discussing his own journey through growth. As the song circles back to Raj, he boasts his triumphs all the while coming back to the same conclusion by asking, “How are you mad at me? I stuck to the plan.”
As the album moves on to “Radius/ No Days Off,” the voice of Raj’s mother enters. This time though, the songs that follow aren’t like the ones before. He has been able to provide specific names in previous songs but this one is an anthem and thank you to those around him. He gives due respect with lines like “Help[ed] me navigate all this craziness” and “Me and my niggas are unified.” After his last statement representing the bond of his friendships, the beat transitions. The song moves away from the fluff and leads into the grittiness that captures the journey he and his people took for the rapper’s return. “No Days Off” is first and foremost the acknowledgment of the downtime he took. It also serves as notice when he says, “Took a few L’s but I bounce right back I’m, OK!” The time he spent away from music was not idle. Rexx Life Raj was cooking up.
The project continues down a gritter path as it transitions into “Scared Money.” Everything from the bass to the reverb in Raj’s voice lets the listener know that the time for games is over. The first verse is about his youth and fighting to get what was due to him. The second verse is upscale. He became accustomed to people who own “LLCs.” He denounces the stereotypical stigma by saying “They want me hitting licks, and sellin’ P/ So I did that shit, legally.” The boy has grown from taking what was owed to him in the streets to a man making deals to be paid what he is worth.
When the project gets to “Settled,” it’s clear that the tone has shifted once again. The song is more upbeat than the rest as it forms into an ode. Rexx Life Raj speaks about feeling “settled” due to the woman in his life. When he raps, “You helped me overcome past trauma that I would cling on/ Qualities of a woman, I might wanna put a ring on you,” it is more than thanking her. This statement alone is saying that whatever it is that she provides, he wants to commit to it and her for life.
While Raj speaks on the value his relationship has brought to him, Russ speaks more on the journey that he and his partner have taken together. Russ raps about the turbulent nature of a relationship but still having the strength to overcome the highs and lows of the journey. He even admits, “Before I found the right one, I made a lot of wrong turns/ Look at us prosper, look at us glow.” Though discussed differently, these relationships have brought a sense of calm to the artists.
In a lot of ways “Heal/ Best of Me” is a release. The song opens with Raj’s mother discussing being healed spiritually. As Raj touches the mic, he is open about his acceptance of his circumstances. The single verse is brimming with messages of staying strong, remaining humble, and adjusting. They also sound like messages spoken by a parent to their child. Raj also relies heavily on a “you” within the verse.
As he says, “You were meant to grow/ You were meant to blossom, and then turn into a rose/ For the times that you were vulnerable, and you felt exposed/ Step into your shine/ Step into your glow,” the song switches perspectives from a parent speaking to a child to the child giving a farewell to a parent.
As Raj’s mother’s voice comes back she displays pain within the ability to be strong. Her voice breaks but she remains steadfast in her faith and then Raj comes back with “Best of Me.” In this song, Raj gives himself credit for not losing himself and remaining strong. He also has the bandwidth to understand that he is still figuring out his place in the world.
In true finale form, “Sunset Over College Park” has so many aspects to it but in its truest form, it is a letter. The letter opens with, “How am I supposed to live without you, I’ll try.” As the letter continues, he apologizes for not being able to provide opportunities to his mother. Though not a child’s job, he wanted to live the dream of giving what he could to his mother. He then speaks on memories involving the care of his mother and times with both parents leading up to the end.
In this song, Raj shares the most important message he received from his mother: “Lean not on your own understanding, And soon I’ll understand that God is love.” Though it is clear that this letter is for his mother, Raj works through his own emotions throughout it. Ms. Linda Wright’s closes out the album with a final prayer for her son and for us: “I’d like to say thank you, Lord. Anyway, I’m done. It took me a lot to do this, but I’m done. I love everybody. I love all of you, and thank you so much for praying for. How you turn this live thing off? I’m sitting in the sun, and this little head gettin’ ready to start drippin’. I ain’t goin’ nowhere.”
Every person may handle grief it differently but the fact remains that there are always five stages in grief; denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. The album is raw, honest, real, and courageous. The Blue Hour is a project that guides its listeners on one man’s journey through grief.
Listen to The Blue Hour below and stay tuned to RMR for more features like this.
